Playpennies

you're being taken for a ride! I don't think I stint on my daughter's birthday but I've spent more than £200 on a party and present. We've had them at soft plays, at halls with entertainers, and at special venues. I think though that if I wasn't able to afford food then I wouldn't be spending that much at all - a birthday tea at home would do it. And for a 2 year old! Like they're ever going to remember.

That sounds a bit tough for you. Are you worried that the children won't get enough to eat if you don't help her out? Why did you start doing this in the first place? £600 is extravagant for a 2 year olds. We spent £80 on the party at that age - him and four friends at a local softplay and we did the food. That includes his presents, half of which I bought second hand from eBay (just as good as new and they don't know - there really is only a small window where you can do this before they start noticing the lack of packaging).

She's a good mum I think and wants to do the best for her child but I think her priorities are off. She only spends about £30-40 a week on groceries for them but if she's not 'saving' for the party now then she should have the money available. I've had a cold this week and avoided her but I feel I have to say something about the party costing a fortune and not really having money to keep supporting her. Also I saw in a thread in facebook she's hoping to go to Spain in the summer. I feel really torn. Everyone deserves a break, but we're supporting her when we don't have to. But I'm worried it'll end the friendship if I don't support her anymore

Do you really need this friendship? She's getting you to pay her food bill, but paying for expensive parties (that you're not invited to) and a holiday in Spain? Is it a real friendship if there's a realistic chance it would end because you don't give her money? I think you're worth more than that.